Robinhood's CFO Exit: Is the Ship Finally Sinking?
Alright, let's get one thing straight: Robinhood. The name alone makes me want to hurl. It's like naming a company "Hope and Rainbows" while simultaneously robbing people blind. But hey, that's just me.
The CFO's Got Outta Dodge
So, the big news is Robinhood's CFO is bailing. Jason Warnick, the guy who was supposed to be steering the financial ship, is jumping overboard. And they expect us to believe it's all sunshine and roses? Please. He's leaving to "pursue other opportunities." Right. That's what they all say when the writing's on the wall. What "opportunities" are better than being CFO of a supposedly thriving fintech company? Unless... oh, wait, maybe it's not thriving.
And look, I get it. CFOs come and go. But the timing, man. The timing. It's like when the captain of the Titanic quietly slips into a lifeboat while everyone else is still doing the Macarena on the dance floor.
Then there's the stock. Down 7.5% after the announcement? Yeah, that's just a coincidence, I'm sure.
The Numbers Game
Robinhood did double its revenue in the third quarter, beating expectations. Okay, fine. But let's dig a little deeper, shall we? Because numbers can lie, and boy, do they love to lie in the financial world. According to Robinhood doubles revenue as it beats third-quarter earnings expectations, revenue doubled in the third quarter.
October crypto revenue disappointed, which is, frankly, hilarious. Remember when crypto was supposed to be the future? Now it's just another way for Robinhood to bleed its users dry. And full-year operating expense guidance also missed the mark. So, they're making more money, but they're still losing money? How does that even work? It's like trying to fill a bucket with a hole the size of Texas in the bottom.
And let's not forget about the insider trading, oh boy.
Insiders Getting Out While the Getting's Good
According to some data, Robinhood insiders have been selling off shares like they're going out of style. I mean, Vlad Tenev (the CEO) alone has sold millions of shares. Millions! And Baiju Bhatt, another bigwig, has also cashed out a small fortune. Hmmm, wonder what they know that we don't?
Offcourse, it's all perfectly legal and above board. They probably just needed to buy new yachts or something. But come on, does that smell right to you? Does it? It's like watching rats flee a sinking ship, but instead of rats, it's the people in charge.
New York Life Investment Management LLC did open a new $15 million position in HOOD. That's something, right? I mean, someone still believes in this dumpster fire. Or maybe they just have too much money and don't know what else to do with it.